Time For Change

April 30, 2011

Hello world!

Today’s verse:

“I was filled with DELIGHT day after day REJOICING ALWAYS in His presence in His WHOLE WORLD and DELIGHTING in MANKIND.” –Proverbs 8:30-31.

I love this. I wish to spend every day of my life DELIGHTING in the Lord, REJOICING that I am allowed to be in His presence. And I DO get to REJOICE in His WHOLE WORLD—or at least Africa, and this is also a great reminder to delight in the people God has made. They are created in His image. And I want to delight in them as well.

This morning at the B&B was delightful. Not going to lie. I kind of wish I had been there this week… Sigh. But that’s ok. God taught me a lot this week in the house. So, all in all, positive.

We were playing with hair this morning. And I have ridiculously long bangs. They are way past my chin. Debs said, “Hey, Ren, do you want me to cut those for you?” I thought about if for like a second.

“YEP!”

SO we hunted down scissors, and Debs gave me some bangs! I love them! She did a quite excellent job.

Then Morgan, Shayna, Debs, Melinda, YoYo and I were off to Muzinberg! We stopped on the way to have a photo shoot by the magical orange wall. The whole day was filled with pictures! Then we took the train exactly two stops to Muszinberg. It is a beautiful beach with a boardwalk. It was pretty empty. But it was lovely. Such a great chill day.

When we returned, I had an awesome talk with Shayna. I love you, girl! I’ll always be here for you J

Then I undertook the challenge of PACKING and trying to decide what I can donate and what I need for my last 14 days in Africa. I did pretty well, if I do say so myself!

For dinner, I didn’t really have anything. So I stole some tuna from Shelli and bread from Debs and made a tuna melt with some cheese I had and the Panini machine in the kitchen! It was awesome.

Then just some chilling while everyone came over.

You guys. It feels kind of weird to still be here. I am done with classes. I am not donating my time at Ethembeni. I am just not contributing. Which is… awkward. (Have you ever noticed that “awkward” is spelled awkwardly?)

It’s definitely time for change. I am glad to move to the hotel tomorrow night.

Tomorrow, Debs and I are having lunch with the Georges! Hooray!! That should be lovely.

I don’t want to want to go. But maybe I am just ready for the change. Is that so bad?

I have to keep reminding myself that God IS my HOME.

If you guys could pray that I remain present here, that would be great. I really want to be content where I am. But that is quite difficult when everyone around me is dying of homesickness and restlessness. Not EVERYONE. But it’s definitely a major theme.

I keep reminding myself that this extra week is an AWESOME idea!! I will be SO GRATEFUL for it!

But right now… all I can think of is my family. And friends. And home. But… I’ve got that one here with me J

Prayers appreciated.

Graduation Day!

April 29, 2011

Today. Was a monumental day.

Because today.

I had my LAST CLASS of freshman year.

Therefore.

I AM NOW A SOPHOMORE OF COLLEGE!!! Wooo hooooo!!!!

Everyone here loves calling me “Freshman,” and rubbing it in my face. But now! No longer!!! I am FREE from mockery! Free from degradation!!! (It was all joking, of course. But still.) The world has to come up with more intellectual verbal sparring now! AHA!!!

Had lunch with Janet, Noelle, and Debs. Woot woot!

Then, a million of us watched GILMORE GIRLS in the lounge!!! My favorite thing of my LIFE!!! YESSSSS.  

Then… I went out to the lawn and read my Bible on the lawn. It was kind of depressing because I got to the part where Tamar was raped and David had an affair with Bathsheba… SO sad.

But. My sadness wouldn’t last for long! Debs and I piled into the stuffed Quantum and headed to the B&B for a sleepover!!! It was SO fun!!!! I got to spend a lot of time with Morgan, Shayna, Melinda, and YoYo. We had a wonderful time J

We watched A Walk to Remember. I have to admit that I cried. THIS is why I want to be an actress. I want to give people a chance to cry all of those tears for other things in life that they couldn’t cry before. Does that make sense? I wasn’t really crying for Jamie. Oh no. I was crying for many elements of my African learning’s and life, etc.

Then Shayna and I hung out with Olivia in the hall for some tears. Oh yeah. We’ve reached emotional instability in the South Africa Semester.

Then Shayna let me snuggle with her, and I had a wonderful sleep.

Injustice and Chats, etc.

April 28, 2011

What a day.

It’s been a good one.

But it’s had a lot of emotional roller coasters.

We woke up bright and early- 6:15, to be exact, to go to Robben Island.

I got to sit with Mackenzie on the way there, which was positive. He reminds me so much of Tommy! I MISS YOU, BROTHER!!!

On the ferry ride over to the island, I sat with Kelly, Heather, Zach, Ally, and Shanyna. Super fun, dude.

Then when we were on the island, I got to hang out with Kelly for a bit. She is so great.

Alright, Robben Island:

Robben Island’s main purpose was to hold political prisoners during apartheid. Not just political prisoners, however—they had to be black males. Black guards were removed from their positions when Robben Island was turned into a political prison, to be sure the prisoners wouldn’t gain grace or support from their fellow blacks.

What really hit me about Robben Island was how recently it was in use for imprisoning innocent freedom seekers. When I think about “injustice,” I think of America’s 1776! (Mostly because there’s a musical about it.) That is quite a while ago. But apartheid was literally during my lifetime. It was ended in 1994! That is so ridiculous! I am embarrassed for white people. I have to wonder at the creator of apartheid. How on earth did he think it would be a good idea to discriminate people based on what they looked like? How does that even make sense? WHO said that whites were supposed to be supreme over the indigenous people of this land? The more I learn about apartheid, the more imbecilic it seems! I can barely stand it. It also makes me think that the government must have done a fantastic job of hiding what was really going on!

They disguised apartheid with the term, “Good Neighbors.” Are you serious!? What is GOOD about apartheid?! Literally, it sucked in ALL areas, because besides people’s rights being completely taken away and losing family, which is bad enough already, it caused violence on both sides and just about killed the economy. WHERE are the positives?! I just don’t understand.

After the tour, I was able to talk to the tour guide. He was a former prisoner. I was so curious as to why he worked on the island and how he felt about it. I certainly would have no interest in being in the place where I was held captive! He explained that when he was offered the job, he had no source of income. He took the position reluctantly. At first, it was exceedingly difficult for him. But as time went on, he became grateful for his job because it helped him heal. He also felt proud that he was conveying the truth about the jail, and not some cleaned up version of the truth.

On the way back to the mainland, I got to have an awesome talk with Allie. She’s great. Then, I had a super positive lunch with Morgan and Wailana.

Before getting on the bus, a man came up to Janet and me and asked for the time. His accent suggested of Afrikaans. We told him the time.

“You are American?” He asked.

“No, I’m South African, and she is American,” says Janet.

“And you are from Cape Town?” Janet asked him.

“NO, actually,” says the dude… now with a FRENCH ACCENT! “I am from France! But now, I have perfected the Afrikaans accent!”

Oh my lanta. I was so excited. That is TOTALLY something I DO.

“You’re French? Je parle le Francais! En petit peu!”

Then he rambled in French.

I gave him my oh so winning “WHAT?!” face.

“You should go to France and learn French,” he tells me.

“Or,” I said in my French accent, “I could just talk like this!”

“Zat ees not bad! You would do very well in France!”

“Merci!” And off we were. It was fun.

On the bus, I had a God-moment with Karissa. Seriously, a God thing. Karissa and I hung out a bit more after we got back.

Then it was time to hang out with Janet! She bought me a mocha and we had a very therapeutic talk staring at the gorgeous ocean. I swear, there is no place more beautiful. AMAZING.

Hung out for Heather a bit.

Then I got dinner with Yolanda! Super positive!

And to finish my lovely day, Debs and I watched “Waiting for Guffman.” Debatably, it’s the best movie of all time J

It was all topped off by a very good night’s sleep.

Stairway to Heaven

April 27, 2011

SO last night, Debs and I had the most amazing talk ever. And it lasted until three in the morning. It was TOTALLY worth it, but it made for a tired day!

In class, we watched “Amandla!” A documentary about the role of music in apartheid. It was fascinating.

I think one of my favorite aspects of South African culture is the music. I love it, love it, love it.

The weather was fair enough today for us to hike Table Mountain! WOOO!!!

It was QUITE daunting. Ahem. It looked JUST like the “Cliffs of INSANITY!!!” (from my all-time favorite movie…)

I hiked with Janet and Lauren. We were in the back, taking it slow and steady so we could really enjoy the beauty on the way up.

It was quite the bugger of a hike though—SO STEEP!!! We hiked for about 3 ½ hours non-stop, STRAIGHT UP. WHEW!!!! SO intense.

And this was the first serious exercise I’ve had since my lovely waterfall hurrah, so… let’s just say I was winded. And my ankle isn’t currently feeling too hot. But that’s totally cool. I’m so happy I got to climb at all!

The beauty was so exquisite, it was hard for me to believe it was real. I kept thinking it was a film set! Hmm… that tells you that I spend a whole lot of my time in nature, hey? NOT. But I am looking forward to some more nature this summer! Woot, woot!

To entertain us on the way up, I shared the story of “Hind’s feet on high places.” I thought it was fitting, considering we were climbing a VERY high place.

And I definitely took advantage of the cavernous echo-y quality and sang,

I lift my eyes up

To the mountain

Where does my help

Come from?

My help comes from you

Maker of Heaven

Creator of the earth

Oh how I need you, Lord!

You’re my only hope

You’re my only prayer!

So I will wait for you

To come and rescue me

Come and give me life!

I lift my eyes up

To the mountain

Where does my help

Come from?

Aaand my current personal favorite…

Up to the mountain

I went up to the mountain

Because you asked me to

Looked over the clouds

To where the sky was blue

I could see all around me

Everywhere

I could see all around me

Everywhere

Sometimes I feel like

I’ve never been nothing but tired

And I’ll be working

‘Til the day I expire

Sometimes I just lay down

Lord, no more can I do

But then I go on again

Because you asked me to

Some days I look down

Afraid, afraid I will fall!

And though the sun shines

I see nothing

Coming and going

Lord telling me softly

You love me so

Love that song.

Lauren and Janet and I definitely had bonding!!!!!

Every SINGLE time we passed someone coming down, they would give us a time estimate. The trouble was, every estimate varied GREATLY.

“10 minutes!”

“An hour and a half!”

“20 minutes!”

By the 10^th person, I was annoyed. WHY did this annoy me? I don’t know. Haha.

When we were nearing the top, struggling for every step, for every breath, and my ankle was throbbing, and Lauren was having trouble with the big steps (she is not the tallest of the tall… J), and Janet was encouraging us, Lauren says, “It’s just like the stairway to heaven!”

I laughed so hard.

Because it WAS!!!! There was an angelic mist that was encircling the top of the mountain! We were suddenly the only ones up there! How did THAT happen?! There was a rock formation that looked like a throne!!!!

“Jesus?!” I called.

Here I am.

Yep. There He was. His beauty just about knocked me over.

SO worth it!!!!

But it was ffrreeezzzing!! What I would have given for a pair of gloves!!!

Then we went to the lovely Table Top of the Mountain Café. Pizza! Woohoo! I got to hang out with Janet for a bit, which was awesome. We have a date for tomorrow J

For the way down, we took the cable car! My ankle couldn’t deal with down hill! No, siree!

The cable car was AWESOME! It had completely windowed walls, so you could see out, and the floor ROTATED so you got to see all aspects of the mountain as we came down. It was legit.

On the bus ride home, I had a God-ordained chat with Miranda. SO beautiful.

Jessie and Amanda and I went to dinner at Tribecca’s. SO fun!!!

The rest of the night was spent KILLING my paper! That’s right! I’m DONE!!!! WOOOO!!!!!!

I can’t believe we have so little time left. It’s weird. But it feels about right. It’s going to be ok. I’m ready for new journeys and adventures. 

It Is Well With My Soul

April 26, 2011

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!! Went my alarm clock at 6:45 AM.

There are few things I hate worse than alarms. But one of those things I hate more than alarms in general is MY alarm. Because you have to hit it multiple times for it to STOP BEEPING. And then. It was dark. Ohh. Waking up in the dark is just not positive. Aaaand it was raining. So it was freezing. And then there was no Internet!!! SO I couldn’t Skype Jenn!!!! AH. My soul. SO SAD. NOT ok, man. NOT ok. And then it was awful because I couldn’t even contact her to tell her I couldn’t skype! The agony.

Eventually, I gave up, and went back to sleep.

I don’t really know how to describe this day. I feel as though it was one of those days when I was caught up in living. Too caught up in it to really realize what was going on…

Last night, I prayed that God would help me to really BE HERE! “Number my days aright” was the actual phrase. I also prayed that He would allow me to spend my time with awesome people that would fill me up, as opposed to weigh me down with negativity. (Not that that happens here, OF COURSE)

So today, I was super blessed in conversation. I got an AWESOME time with Debs and Morgan. God really outdid himself on that one J Then I got to hang out with Tyler. Which is always fantastic.

The Internet is still too lame to do research for my paper, which is frustrating. But I’m not worried. I have until Friday, so I’m bound to get some research in by then!

This morning I was reading 2 Samuel, where David decides to build a palace of cedar for the ark of God, as David was living in a palace of cedar and the ark of God was staying in a tent. But God appeared to Nathan the prophet and told him not to build the ark a palace. God does not dwell in a house! And He is not defined by where His ark stayed!

Ok. You guys. How stinking BLESSED are we that THIS is our God?! He let His servant David live in a palace, while His ark remained in a TENT. That is unlike any other ruler in the universe. That just shocks me.

God is bigger than any dwelling place.

Which is cool. Because I have seen a variety of dwelling places here. They have ranged from mansions, suburban houses, to shacks, and the street.

Let us not be defined by where we live. But what’s in our hearts, hey?

Is it weird that I ALWAYS discover Biblical parallels to life in South Africa? Is that bad?

Shelli has a 16 year old friend named Abby. Abby has a tumor in her back. Tonight Shelli asked us to pray for her, because she was going to find out tomorrow if the doctors wanted to continue treatment, or if her case was hopeless.

Shelli just found out that Abby had a stroke, and then seizures as implications.

WHY, GOD?! Has she not been through enough?! What about her family?! Why are you allowing this suffering Lord?

Then I come back to my room, and the song “It is well with my soul” is playing.

No, Lord. It is not well with my soul.

“Oh, my soul, praise the Lord.”

I don’t want to praise Him.

But in this moment I think I understood the true meaning of joy.

Being in this pain and crap is life. But choosing to see that God is bigger and has a plan. I don’t know if that helps at all. But for me it does. God is steering this ship. He knows the way home. 

Hit in the Face by Glory

April 25, 2011

Sharing a bathroom with 7 other girls is a great way to start the morning! Lots of super close love… or something like that.

This was a chapel/ class day.

I LOVE chapel days. So positive.

In worship, we sang beautiful songs that were such great reminders of what Jesus did for us:

Mighty to Save

Everyone needs compassion

A love that’s never failing

Let mercy fall on me

Everyone needs forgiveness

The kindness of a savior

The hope of nations

Savior, He can move the mountains

My God is mighty to save

He is mighty to save

Forever, Author of salvation

He rose and conquered the grave

Jesus conquered the grave

So take me as you find me

All my fears and failures

Fill my life again

I give my life to follow

Everything I believe in

Now I surrender

Shine your light and

Let the whole world see

We’re singing

For the glory

Of the Risen King

We also sang “Holy is the Lord.” Not going to lie. That song has been SO OVERSUNG my entire life. So much so, that it never held much meaning for me, as I began to block it out.

Today, however, I decided to munch on the lyrics.

And… they’re pretty spectacular. I guess. :P

Holy is the Lord,

God Almighty!

The earth is filled with His glory.

I feel like I’ve never truly liked or understood the word “holy.” I immediately associate the word with “holy cow.” Which… you know… is definitely NOT what Chris Tomlin meant.

But when I truly stop and think about the word “holy,” I think of the word “sacred.” Sacred means too clean, too perfect, too magnanimous to be defiled by ordinary people like me.

Often, I have found that Christians don’t take their relationship with Christ very seriously. I wonder if that’s because we are encouraged, and BLESSED, to enter into a RELATIONSHIP with Christ. That’s the purpose of Christianity in its essence, and that’s how we grow and learn and become more like our Father. (That’s my opinion, anywho!)

I believe that we forget that our God is holy. He is sacred. We are not entitled to be in a relationship with Him. We are not worthy, or pure, or clean enough to consider ourselves as an equal in a relationship, of course.

I want us NEVER to forget that we must humble ourselves to be with Him! It is a PRIVELIGE, not a right. And that deserves respect.

I am reminded of this when I am face to face with His glory. Which is pretty much always, because the earth is filled with it.

It can be hard to notice in our busy lives in the same place.

But I’ve been so lucky to go somewhere new.

And His glory is hitting me in the face.

The rest of my day, I pretty much worked on my final paper. I am writing 6 pages on art used as a form of protest in South Africa. Besides a group project that is due tomorrow, I will be DONE with assignments for Quinton’s class as soon as I knock out this paper! Which… may be a while… because I am just NOT motivated. And… with the internet being what it is… let’s just say, I am predicting a bit of a process.

Got to hang out with Morgan for a bit! Super positive! We were going to have a dinner date, but, alas… she is staying at the Bed and Breakfast, NOT BI, so there were transportation issues. Sniff, sniff.

For dinner, Noelle made our house wannabe Mac ‘N Cheese! Which was AWESOME because I MISS IT!!!! I definitely expect to be eating that a lot next semester (AHEM, Roomies ;)

So, tonight, I leave you with this thought. I can’t take credit for it; I stole it from Mackenzie (he spoke in chapel this morning.)

Live a life as full of love as you can possibly muster, in the victory of Jesus Christ.

(Yep. That’s pretty much my life goal. J)

Peace out.

And I Will Follow

April 24, 2011

HAPPY EASTER!!!

I am so sad I don’t get to spend this significant day with my family!!! (Nightingales, Loney, Pryors, Bosloughs)

Yet, every cloud has a silver lining.

Today has been idyllic. I woke up simply grateful to be living. And grateful that somebody cool rose from the dead for me like a kajillion years ago. J

For breakfast, Debs, Noelle and I went down to Olympia bakery. I got a loaf of bread for breakfast and a chocolate croissant for the week.

Just kidding. Switch that. ;)

Then we went to Tribecca for some delectable beverages. Debs ended her water fast today! Congrats, my dear! Rooibos for Debs, mocha for me and chai tea latte for Noelle.

It was when we were staring out into the mist in the café themed to be New York City, and I was drinking my magical mocha that I realized… I am inexplicably, incandescently happy. (Girls. Name that movie J)

I also realized that I am SO excited for life. Here are some reasons why:

-I am in South Africa. Duh. But still. I am hit by this realization QUITE often. As it should be J

-I am constantly reminded of Christmas. It is officially California Christmas weather here. Debs and I have been watching Christmas movies. The spirit of Christmas is in the air!!!

-I made grilled cheese today. BAM. Oh yes. I am going to start my own restaurant selling foods with ONLY bread and cheese: pasta, quesadillas, grilled cheeses, toasted cheese, garlic bread with melted cheese… the possibilities are ENDLESS.

-Debs and I made Rice Crispy Treats in honor of Easter! They only and pink AND white marshmallows. So they’re totally festive.

-My lovely roomie and I watched Love Actually. SO GOOD!!!!

-I am getting positive internet today! Glorious. I am exceedingly thankful.

-I am going to New York the second I get back to the States!! I miss theatre SO much. I am so psyched to travel MORE!

I know it’s weird. But I’m even excited to travel back to America. Planes… airports… travelers… they all have stories… AH. I should be an author. J

-And THEN I’m excited for my life!!!

*ZIMBABWE AND ZAMBIA

*Turning LEGAL in AFRICA with dear friends!!!

*NYC

*Working at church

*Beach house for a week (WHAT?!)

*Singing for Angels and Dodgers

*Wyoming

*Bridges

*Alpha

*Rooming with my best friends!!!

*Back at APU!!!

*CHRISTMAS!!! (It’s ABOUT TIME.)

*Rome with my love, Katherine!!!

*And then another birthday!!

Dudes. I SWEAR I’m not trying to brag…. I’m just so dang EXCITED!!! Truly, truly blessed.

The rest of my day was spent chilling doing homework and catching up on my APU blog. Woot woot.

For dinner, all the girls in my house made chicken quesadillas. SO good! Then we watched 10 Thing I Hate About You.

Then I was blessed enough to be able to skype Francesca and Danielle! It was awesome, but made me miss them so much more. THANKS, GUYS.

THEN I battled it out with the internet and got to see Jenn for about 30 seconds, and Tommy, Mommy, and Nana for about 5!

I got to type Jenn for a bit! Looking forward to our date!!!

Then I got to type Mike, Tommy and Dad!!!

Tonight, God reminded me of something.

Truly, I am living the road less traveled by. And I need to choose to be ALL where wherever I am. Does that make sense? I feel like I’ve never fit in anywhere. And I’m sure a LOT of that is my fault and my own insecurity.

But still, I feel like I never really truly have found a place to belong.

But I’m realizing that I don’t really care.

God has given me people who are walking alongside me: Mom, Dad, Tommy, Nana, Mike, Jenn, Francesca, Danielle, Demaree, Debs, and SO many more wonderful individuals that have changed my life in FANTASTIC ways.

And if “fitting in” means giving up the life path God has planned for me… well, heck. I don’t want it anyway.

I don’t need to fit in anymore.

Because I’m not afraid of who I am, and who God is molding me into. I am His jar of clay.

So, my song of the day:

And I will Follow

Ask me something easier

A smile, a kiss

Look, I’ll give you anything

But don’t ask me this

Don’t ask for faith

When there’s no great supply

Don’t ask for love

When I’m just now beginning to feel it

And don’t know quite why

Here come the waves

Here comes the ocean

How to decide

What’s there to risk?

Why is the course unclear?

Practical fact

Foolish emotion

Terrible Pride

What’s there to fear?

Take me from here!

And I will follow

Anywhere

And I will follow

Anywhere

And You will lead me there

I should resist

I should refuse you

Ask me again

See how I’m strong

See how I keep my vow

Maybe I’ll trip

Maybe I’ll lose you

What happens then?

What happens now?

Just show me how

And I will follow

Anywhere

And I will follow

And you will lead me there

Oh all the voices that tell me to stand my ground

Oh all the voices that beg me to stay

All representing a life that I’d planned around

Do what’s expected

Do what’s accepted

Do what you’re told to

Until today

Til today!

And I will follow

Anywhere

And I will follow

And you will lead me there

You will lead me there.

Don’t Fear Death, But Rather the Unlived Life

April 23, 2011

Happy Saturday!

Debs and I got to sleep in!!! Well… a little… but there’s this little thing I like to call “the Alarm Before the Alarm,” the lovely Parker. She loves to make noise in the morning! Well… any time, really…

But hey! We got to sleep a little longer than usual!

After breakfast, Corinne, Luke, Jordan, Debs, Parker and I went to the mall. It was awesome! Debs and I got some groceries for the week:

-Granola (addicted)

-Strawberry Yogurt (divine with the granola)

-Cheese (to go on the break from the nearby bakery!)

Francesca and Danielle! I was practicing for our apartment! Woooohoooo!!!! (Love you guys. Just in case you forgot J)

Then I got to go to Clicks and pick up some toiletries. Super Positive!

Apparently, Mama Corinne wanted to reward us all for being such good children, so she took us to Wimpy’s for ice cream! I swear. I have never eaten so much ice cream in my life. This won’t last much longer, folks.

Then Corinne had to go back to Pick ‘N Pay. The crowds were HORRIFIC in there! The cues were MILES LONG! I realized I needed toothpaste. So I had my one item in a line that was taking years. But I decided to be super fine with waiting and grateful to be in Africa. The man behind me said,

“I think it’s totally unfair that you have to go through all of THIS just for THAT.” What’s wrong with this toothpaste, pal?! Just kidding.

“Oh, it’s really no big deal. I don’t mind. Thanks, though!”

When I FINALLY got up to the front, the man said, “You are a very patient girl. Good luck to ya.” Well. Perhaps I was a shining non-complainer for the day? Cool beans J

When we returned home, there was just an hour before departing. SO sad! Corinne sad with Debs and me and told us a very significant story of her life. I will never forget it.

Then we drove to the church. It was really sad to say goodbye to my family AGAIN. Gosh dang.

Corinne gave Debs and me a picture frame of us with the Georges! It is so cute! I love it. SO sweet.

Then we headed back to BI. I am currently in an apartment with Debs, Jessie, Kim, Carmen, and Noelle. Should be good! Looking forward to getting to know them better!

PLUS!! I HAVE BETTER INTERNET!!!!! PRAISE JESUS!!!!!!! HOLY HOSANNA!!!! AH. So happy.

I only have 20 days left.

That sounds so SHORT!

But really… that would sound so LONG to me before I came here. The longest I’d really ever been anywhere was about two weeks.

So, I have about three weeks.

OH my.

God, what do you have for me in these twenty days?

For dinner, the people at BI and I went once again to the pancake and waffle house. I got a chicken and avocado crepe! Woot! It was surprisingly tasty.

Once we were back at the house, I began my South Africa slideshow! I have high hopes for it! It should be positive J

I got to skype with Mama for a bit tonight!

Debs and I are sharing this room that we assume used to belong to kids. On the walls, there are random quotes.

My favorite?

“Don’t fear death, but rather the unlived life.”

Amen.

Are you truly living?

I think I am. And I am learning how to be true to myself and my Lord in a PLETHURA of situations. And I’m doing my best. I know I don’t have it down perfectly yet, but I am LIVING. And I believe I am living life to the full J.

It may be a bit of a hard week. Prayers are appreciated!

But I think it will result in a lot of Ren-and-Jesus time. And… I am missing the down side of that J

Hey… this applies to Easter!

Jesus didn’t fear death.

He feared that we would lead lives that weren’t truly lived. He feared that we wouldn’t be able to live eternally for him.

So he defeated death so that we might spend forever living with Him in Heaven.

Happy Easter Eve J

While You Were Sleeping

April 22, 2011

Hey Y’all.

Guess what I did this morning?!

I went to an Anglican church service to celebrate Good Friday.

For three hours.

Yep.

Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE Jesus! I truly do. And church. I love it. But THREE HOURS. Of Anglican.

Oh my lanta. I was POSITIVE Christ was going to come back before it was done!

Yikes. I am kind of scarred for life. Whew.

Jordan, Luke and Parker didn’t have to go to service! But of course, the Americans had to. I’m not bitter. :P

Who has heard of Pickle Fish? And Hot Cross Buns?

Apparently every family in South Africa eats them on Good Friday to celebrate Jesus feeding the 5,000.

After the torture of the morning, Debs and I took three hour naps.

Then I did some homework…

Super chill day.

Then we played UNO!!!! WOOOOHOOO! But not thermo-nuclear. So not as exciting.

Then Debs and I watched “While You Were Sleeping.” SO POSITIVE!!! I love that movie an immense amount.

I feel like “While You Were Sleeping” is a positive summary for my day.

Indeed.

Is This Real Life?

April 21, 2011

This morning, I was excited for life.

Breakfast was absolutely phenomenal. There was something magical about the granola, yogurt, and fruit… maybe it was the super cheesy soap opera in the background?! (Marion discovered her father was alive after a WHOLE lifetime of thinking he was dead, and now she doesn’t have to sell the dance studio!) I don’t know WHAT it was. But it was a party. Thanks, Corinne!

In the taxi on the way to BI, I was staring out the window. I thought… “This is my Africa.” I truly love it.

You guys. I just feel so incredibly blessed to be here. And yes, it’s getting harder to be here… I miss my family, especially as Easter approaches! But still, there’s no place I’d rather be.

I feel like Peter, when he’s in the boat with the disciples. When I keep my eyes on Jesus, I can walk on water! All is well! I LOVE being here!!! But when I lose sight of the Lord, and His purpose for me here, I start wishing for my family and the states, and many other things that are silly, like my room, a shower, etc. Wanting family isn’t silly. But the other stuff is.

Today was field trip day! On the bus, I sat with Mary Bette and Melinda and Shayna. Mary Bette and I had a FANTASTIC talk about self worth. Woot woot!

Our first stop was a look out point. Truly breath-taking. It was here that Tyler showed me his tattoo! He got “Ethembeni” above his heart in bold lettering. It looks amazing. Ethembeni, of course, is where Tyler and I worked for service sites. Ethembeni also means “Place of Hope.” Therefore, Tyler got the tattoo to symbolize that his heart is indeed a place of hope, as well as to remind him of EVERYTHING he learned while there, as it was a life changing  experience for him too! I am so excited for him. Thumbs up, dude ;)

At this time, 11:00 AM, our tour guide decided it was time for lunch. Alrighty, then. The options: Pick ‘N Pay, or McDonalds. There was a mall right across the street. Heather and I weren’t feeling these options… so we dashed over to the mall in search of yummy goodness! We found it in the form of Mug and bean. Oh, how I shall miss you when I return to the States, dear M&B! We both got mozzarella, pesto, and tomato salads for “take away.” Unfortunately, our salads came at 11:32, when we were supposed to be at the bus at 11:30. We made like Donald and ducked (as Paul says)!

Ok, side note. Our semester is not incredibly punctual. We’re about 7 minutes late generally. But of COURSE, the ONE TIME I was late, everyone was super on time. Everyone was staring at us and “ooooohing” as we clambered on board. So embarrassing! But hey. We had ROCKIN’ lunches. And they didn’t! Hmph!

Next, we drove to the MOST South-Western point of ALL OF AFRICA! ‘Twas called the Cape of Good Hope! I have read about the Cape before, so it was exciting to see it in actuality!

 I think the Cape is one of the most BEAUTIFUL places I have ever seen.

We climbed up to a light house to get a better view (who knew it could be any MORE gorgeous?!). There was this point when I stopped on the way up, caught by the beauty, and I realized that I was alone. But I also realized I didn’t feel alone. Because I wasn’t alone. Not really. And then I discovered that I was spending time with someone I honestly wanted  to spend time with! I stood there admiring my father’s creation. And a small thought popped into my mind: “I did it.”

As a seventeen year old, I left my country, my family, my friends, and everything I knew and I came to a foreign country with 54 strangers. That was one of the scariest things I have ever done! And I was successful! I have been blessed beyond belief! I have learned SO much. I am not the same person I was when I got on the plane.

My hugest goal I wanted to accomplish when studying abroad was acquiring confidence. I didn’t know whether or not I would be able to.

As I was admiring the Cape, I remembered a conversation I’d had with my friend Heidi when I was fourteen years old, and in the show Magdalene.

Heidi was the most confident person I’d ever seen! One day, I decided to ask her, “Heidi! How did you become so confident?!”

“I went through a very lonely time in my life. God grew me so much! And it was really, really painful. But it was so worth it, because look at me now!”

Today I thought, was this my lonely time? If so… it wasn’t even that bad! And how BLESSED am I that it wasn’t that painful, and that it happened in SOUTH AFRICA?!

Thinking back, it was painful. I have felt a lot of hurt. But it was all because of growing pains. And I would go through them again and again to learn the valuable things I’ve been lucky enough to learn!

I know I have a long way to go… but I think I have—rather, I KNOW I have—gained more confidence! I am so excited. Sigh.

After this lovely adventure, it was time to go. But no one was on the bus… and Heather and I naturally REALLY wanted some coffee… SO we ran away to find some! Lucky for us, there was an award-winning little store right outside the bus! With COFFEE!!! Unfortunately… I believe they won their award for the slowest coffee-making in South Africa. Ahem. So once again… we were the LAST ones on the bus!!!

I have NEVER been the last one on the bus, besides today! So, obviously, I had to make up for it. I was making an entrance!

Our final field trip stop was to see the penguins!

WHO KNEW THERE WERE PENGUINS IN SOUTH AFRICA?! When you think penguins, don’t you picture icy slopes and Eskimos and igloos? So do I. We are both wrong, my friend.

Their mating call is like a LAWN MOWER.

It’s great, because on the way there, I asked Shayna, “What does a penguin sound like?”

We never could have suspected the answer. You couldn’t miss it for MILES.

On our way back to BI, Janet and I hopped off the bus a bit early to go to my doctor’s appointment.

This I was real excited for.

NOT.

I have been PRAYING and praying that he would not find it necessary to pull out that scalpel again…!!!!!!

On the way to the office, I told Janet (my Bible buddy) that I was reading through 1 Samuel and LOVING IT, and she says to me, “Renna… did you know that I’m studying David right now??”

Um. “NO!!!” Jesus. What’s up.

SO I told her all about my excitement with David and we were super happy about it… and then—

“Renna, the doctor will see you now”

GULP.

“How is your arm doing, Renna?”

“SO much better, sir!” Do you like the sir?! Will it keep you from your power tools?! “I have been taking my meds every day and changing the gauze and putting savlon (South African Neosporin) on it and keeping it clean! Did I mention I was taking my meds?!” See, Doc? No surgery necessary!!!

“Let’s have a look.”

In literally about 30 seconds, he checked it, gave me new gauze, said I was fine, wished me happy Easter, and charged me 315 Rand.

THANKS.  SO apparently, I am single handedly paying for his Easter party or something. Right on.

Janet and I didn’t have a ride home, and we decided to skip the train. This gave us great time for some hardcore conversation. She blew my mind with her new revelations about David and Jonathon.

And then she told me her story.

I am struggling to see God in it. She has been through so much. And her faith is solid as a rock. I have so much respect for what she’s gone through. It’s amazing to see how God has shaped her amidst much ugly.

I don’t understand, Lord. I really don’t. But thankfully, I don’t have to. I trust that you were at work the whole time, Father. And that you will reveal your purpose in due course.

I honestly believe that nothing we go through is in vain. Take hope in that in whatever pains and struggles you’ve gone through.

I was super blessed by my time with Janet. I don’t know what I’d do without her.

On the way home, Debs and I convinced our taxi driver to drop by Pick ‘N Pay so we could assemble the necessary items to cook spaghetti for our family! Mission: Successful.

When we made the spaghetti, I don’t know how much our family liked it! “I’ve never had this before!”

I was SHOCKED. At home, pasta is all I eat. ALL combinations of pasta… I couldn’t imagine my life without it.

Therefore, Debs and I changed their life tonight.

I think they were kind of iffy on it though J.

We were then off to Ghost Town. We got rid of Jordan and Luke. We have officially replaced them! WOOOOO HOOOOOO! Just kidding. They are staying the night at their grandparents so that they don’t have to go to the THREE HOUR church service tomorrow.

Don’t get me wrong. I love Jesus AND church. But a three-hour Anglican service may be a bit too much to handle.

It was about this time that Debs and I REALLY needed chocolate. It was an emergency. And the horrible part was that there was LOADS of chocolate in the house! But it wasn’t for us! It was for the kids at church! NOOOOOOO!!!

I volunteered us to help stuff the Easter “packets,” hoping there would be chocolate left over. It was TORTURE stuffing packet after packet with chocolate Easter bunnies, chocolate eggs, Kit Kats, and giant chocolate bars, knowing I couldn’t have any. Sniff, sniff.

However! When we were done, there were a bunch of Kit Kats and mini chocolate eggs left. Paul let us eat them!!!!

HAAAAAALELUJAH!!!!!!! THEY WERE SO GOOD!!!!!

I honestly believe that chocolate has the ability to make things better. It’s true.

And now, Debs and I are sitting having our blogging/ picture uploading/ journaling/ Bible reading time.

It’s quite the party.

No class tomorrow!

Woot Woot!

Hey. Today I went to the South-Western edge of South Africa.

Is this real life?

Rain, Tatoos, and Kings

April 20, 2011

We were greeted this morning with a lovely pitter patter of rain. When it’s raining, there is nothing more positive than staying inside and watching movies with hot chocolate, OR exploring outside in a raincoat and rain boots.

I couldn’t perform option number one…

SO after class, Debs and I adventured off into the now crazy hardcore rain, in order to go to Pick and Pay. We are cooking dinner for our family tomorrow and needed supplies.

About of the quarter of the way there, the side walk ended… just like Shel Silversteen said… and we had to choice but to turn back! The wind was biting! And there were no rain boots for Renna L. Sad day.

When we got back, everyone had gone to get tatoos. So I thought, HEY, WHY NOT get a TATOO in SOUTH AFRICA!!!

So I got an outline of Africa covering my whole shoulder blade!

IT WAS SO SCARY. I hate needles. But Debs held my hand. And now I’ll have it forever!

Just kidding.

HAHA.

But I am thinking about getting one when I get home.

Joy <- something like that really, uuber, super small on my wrist, possibly in white.

After turning back dejectedly, Zach, Kristina, Debs and I were the only ones left at BI! Kristina and Debs did homework. Zach and I decided to explore the tide pools in the rain. QUITE the party. I may or may not have accidentally killed a starfish by holding it out of water too long L

It was beautiful. I am in love with the beach here! So spectacular!!!

Then Zachariah and I headed back to find people to go on an adventure with. Unfortunately… no one wanted to come and we were super hungry. We went to Fish & Chips! I have yet to have fish and chips in my life… I figured it was ABOUT TIME.

Zach had been to this place FOUR TIMES already! He was super tight with the manager. This resulted in free rolls. Woot woot!

My fish and chips were quite delightful.

When we returned, we got together with Melinda to schedule more of our extra week! I’m SO excited! I just can’t hide it! (It’s a song. Duh. J)

When I got home, I was so excited to discover that for dinner, we were having…. FISH AND CHIPS!!!! WOOOOO!!!

It was really good, of course. But not going to lie. I felt DISGUSTING. So much grease in one day! BLEH!

We watched a super fantastic movie called “Into the Blue” with Jessica Alba. It was about treasure and drugs! A real winner, right? I very much enjoyed it J

I missed Mom a lot today L.  Can’t wait to hang out with you, Mommy!!!

I learned the most AWESOME things about David in 1 Samuel today!!!

Ok. First off. I did not know that David was Saul’s harp player! Therefore, he watched Saul rule! Almost all of the time! He was learning how to be a great king, either by example, or learning what not to do! WAY to be a planner, God! And he was used to being a servant, so when he later became king, he wasn’t all big-headed!

And THEN I didn’t realize how much David went against the world’s standards. The entire army, as well as the king, was pressuring him to use armor and shields and weapons, etc. And David KNEW how to use armor; he was Saul’s armor boy! Can you imagine telling the entire Israelite army: “It’s cool guys. I’m just going to use a rock and a sling.” NO FEAR.

PLUS! God prepared David differently. He knew how to kill lions and bears; not people.

I was real excited about that J

I want to be like David. COMPLETELY in tune with what God wants, and choose to be oblivious to what the world wants.